Today no more mood to work,feel languid,headache,faintish.
Feel like wanna get sick already.
Listened Chi Lam's song while on the way goin back home by mrt....make me recall my passed memories...
My Heart was crying...
i'm not filled with joy at here,
i'm still not suit the environment & the life here.
I very miss...
my parents,
my friend,
my old colleague,
my enjoyable life,
miss someone always call n care me without any particular relationship.
I REALLY MISS U GUYS SO MUCH!

19.12.2008

I'm so happy now that i can fighting with my 'enemy' without fear and tear.

This mental disorder gal Kitty so like to bully ppl even her compatriot and that Maggie uphold that Kitty and negotiation with me.

But i really be pride myself coz i can take a firm stand in front of them and talk out the dissatisfied problem.

I can bother what they done for me b4.I can endure u guys few times but not means every time i also can make it.

''Good will be rewarded with good and evil with evil.''I'll keep remember what my mom advise for me of this word,really meaning full.

Wuhu~~

And thanks for Maggie coz of u keep said i learned so slow,make u get angry in front of others ppl...make me more stressed and cried at night that time...coz of this make me be more strong to face everything,now i can face the fact and handle it well.

Thank you very much!

AND I'm not the one who are UNGRATEFUL.

~ stressed ~

Feel like don't wanna to work here.
i'm so tired work at here,
that few few colleague really make me be afraid to go to work.
I don't like their attitude.
Really not like here...
damn boring the life here,work at M'sia more relax and enjoy than here and the pay also ot bad compare with here.
I wan to back arh~~
who can help me??
so STRESSED....
no more smiled and happinese while at here.
can't eat much much nice food,
can't keep shopping,
must always think of the budget,
not enough money to use,
no more friends at here,
became more thin and pallid.
How came my life will became like this?
when i can depart from this toilsome life?
like a hell...i can't stand here anymore...
sob sob~ i need a space to calming down.

Is our 2nd round...change to Marina Barrage.just bcoz want to take photo...


Sister brother


Show my piggy's face...


aiya~want put a rabbit hand on his head..but cant c anymore.

Katherine want to fight Vincent...but he's act cute there.

act like Tiger?

wow~~nice hor!

Have u see the S'pore flyer?

Simply is natural...

Wow just came back from yam cha.now already ..but I didn’t feel so sleepy anymore.i knew a new fren from Katherine,he’s her customer cum fren

He fetch us go to keppel bay island yam cha....so nice the environment!feel so relax n enjoy~~

The toilet so clean...

Katherine is here...she's so photogenic,pretty also.

I like this pic...look so nice.Frenz 4eveR

At sg only have this gal gal's frenz.

walking~walking~

Damn nice the place,katherine is on the phone actually.

Soh Soh~~

We took pic,syok sendiri.

He's so friendly,just knew each other few hrs look like a old friend.

Again~~

Keppel Bay Island (ask the waiter took for us)

zou~ zou~ zou~

Tired,bored,painful...so sienz!

Tiring to work, boring to training, whole body was pain.Be a body therapist not a easy thing.I might not suitable on this position.

...Stressful...sob sob...arghh~~

Don't like the environment here, why my life will going on like this..damn crazy bored.

Hmm~~ feel so scared, when the time go to work.It's might good for me but i really don't feel like wanna stay anymore.Pls..pls fire me then i can no need to bear the 2years contract...fire me then i can run away~~

Pls....i don't want work at True Harmony larhh~not TRUE also...

PLS FIRE ME!

Have a memories with him....

Just now chit chat with Sammi(Mei)…really long time never chat with her even a message.
She ask me 'why u look sad'...coz of working at here feel stress n pressure lorhh!

Suddenly, she ask 'you bf leh?'...Oops~~ my bf? he's went to N.Z already.....

Don’t know why.. i so miss him suddenly coz of mei pick up him?

I really MISS HIM...

is he make me grow up last time,

he want me go to KL working,

want me to be independent,

Last time i really hate him.. hate him force me do the things i don’t like. bcoz tat time

i really cant stay alone,

can’t no one accompany,

hate to walk n by LRT go to work (tat time he need to outstation 3-4times once a week)

teach me a lot,

wan me to learn more,

make me more mature.

Pay me money and every sunday fetch me go to learn a small beauty course...

I still remember to be graduate tat day have a make up competition, only he and my 3rd sister(coz she's my model) is my supporter, my mood damn down on tat time coz all ppl have parents come over to support them but i only have 2 ppl.

While award tat time..3rd prize is XXX(still rmb is a gal),2nd prize is XXX.....hmmm...don’t have my name, so sad i lose already...they also thought me lose already...the 1st prize is...sorry is not a guy(all ppl tot is a guy will get it)is..no.19...

Oops~~~is me!! we look toward each other...he's so surprise, me too..

walk 2gether and hold my sister hand to the stage...want me to talk out wat i feel now...haha~ i only have 2 supporter sure is thanks for them lor n my teacher also. feel so funny tat time coz I’m blur to talk.

After that he find a beautician job for me...at pj(True Spa)that time is good coz i everyday drive his car went to work,

but his car crash already coz of me. he's nt even angry, just care of me while came back from outstation.if for others guy maybe will scold me already.. but he's NOT.

Then after few month he went to N.Z, leave me alone at there...that time i was hurt, totally change...go club, smoke, everyday after finish work wont stay at home coz i scare alone....just hang out with frenz....then we break off.. coz he say i have another guy already...just break, i just wan to be bad tat time...

coz of him, i became a bad ppl. i wont really like on someone on tat time...the guys who're know me on tat time, they will know coz i wont pay attention for them. even the ppl i like tat time is sam n kit, i also never care bout them.(so sorry)

Until after March'08,only i change abit... with kit.. bt tat time he not so care about me coz he was fear.. until after April(is a bad period for me, still will think of 'it')

But now.. already 1yr plus break with tat N.Z ex, still have contact with him. actually within this 1yr, he gt asked me compound with him but i know i cant accept him even i still love on him, coz i have a bad secret that i know he cant forgive me if him know. but luckily we still is frenz, he still care on me, still protect me no matter wat happended, anytime and anywhere...
So sorry for him...

this is the pillow case,i done it for him b4 he went to N.Z

The letter/note i wrote for him 2gether with the pillow case tat nite b4 he went to N.Z

The time nearby he went to N.Z,still have few month.

The memories with him...today just get it(all the pic at his phone coz i don't have so he send for me)

With my 'so so' sister.

Like to hold ur back...

Wish can get ur hug....

I hope i have a chance to lay on ur shoulder again...but i know it was impossible now.

My sisters brother...and him

With my sisters and bro-in-low...

My small Beauty Courses Graduate (10.06.07)

a

Beauty Training Courses.Graduation Group Photo

My sister,is my model.

Both of my teacher's student also won on this make-up competition


Shu jin is my courses mate.

Just now walk alone after finish work...while i'm walking alone,my brain layout a lot of question suddenly.

• -what i wan?
• -what should i do for the next step?
• -why will want to came S'pore working?
• -why want to make myself so stressful?
• -why i dont want to go back to my own sweet hometown?(2yrs contract arhh~cant resign arh~)
• -why i want to choose True Harmony?

I hate to work here,hate the workin hours,hate tat body cosultant maggie..cibai betul.she's the one keep push the pressure for me...be a body therapist not easy...

• a lot of body theory need to know
• a lot of body massage step need to learn
• a lot of mechine make me confused
• some ppl make me no mood go to work

I so miss my papa mama suddenly,

I want to go back and stay at my sweet home

I dont like the life like now,damn bored like sohai...

sob...sob...

emo~~~

7.45am

Don't know why today i woke up so early,

i can't even sleep well at the whole night.

It's becoz of the Body Check Up Report???

WHY?my health have any condition?

NO LAaa...

juz becoz of want to apply the work permit,

SO MUST to check it up lorrr...

BUT...

why i damn fuckin worried about it? (@_T)

why i lose the confidence to my health condition?

why why why????

11am

Is the time want and go to collect my report.

Really hope everything will going well without hitch..

then i can be fast to start work lorrh,really bored to stay at home whole month(got go out to stroll also la,if nt i'll die)

Ooops..whole mth i didn't work already?so relax horr?hehe...Hmm~~so fast the time be gone.

PRAY for me ya!!

PLS...pls...pls...

)=失败的感情=(

我知道我长得并没有他人可爱并没有他人那么美，但为什么你要在那么多人的面前嫌弃我？为什么不尊重下我？既然我并不是你喜欢的那一类型、并不是你要的我，那为什么还要和我在一起？


你说得对“一个脾气暴躁，一个小气，要在一起的确有点难”，彼此都不肯互相让步，唯一的结局就是结束。我是个不善于表达自己内心的人，也不喜欢跟人家吵，所以每每我们吵架时，我都是沉默的那一个。。。因为我觉得痛苦是用来独自承受的，快乐才是用来分享的！不懂的处理感情是我的“死穴”吧。其实你对我很好，但却是忽冷忽热的。


"If you don't love yourself, you'll risk being overly dependant on your partner."
(如果你不会爱自己，你将会极度冒险地依赖你的配偶。)
也许是我太依赖你了，把爱全都给了你，忘了疼爱自己，最后换来的却是伤痕累累。
男人啊。。。越是爱你们，越是疼你们，你们就不再会珍惜我们了吗？为什么你们要这样？你们都是这副德性的吗？

爱像战争，开始容易，结束很难，忘记更不可能。
一个人若是对某段感情死了心，要补救的机会是非常的艰难，因为那个已考虑得清清楚楚这段感情已不由得他再做任何抉择了。
如果有一天我对你已完完全全地死心了，请你不要怪我，因为我挣扎了很久，终于懂得学会该如何去更爱自己的时候了。我知道要彻底地忘记你是没可能的。但，我会让自己学着去适应没有你陪在我身边的日子。爱一个人并不需要真正拥有他，其实放手也是一种爱。

昨天无意见在你的柜桐里看见你的她的回忆，看见你们相爱又开心的过去，我的心不晓得为什么会有一股刺痛...
虽然说是过去的回忆，但我还是会吃醋。arh.....

老公，我ღ你！

5月20日,3.57am

突然见从睡梦中醒了，
刚才我们有小争吵。。。
我把电话关了机，
静静地躺在床上睡着了。

你有在msn上找我，
但我因为睡着了却没有回复你。
这是我们复合后第一次闹得那么不开心的。
我承认是自己过分了，
因为那么小事就讲了不可轻易说出口的分手那两个字。
对不起。。。。

就因为朋友打电话来和我聊天，
聊完后问你要回了吗？
因为这样你而生气吗？
这未免也太过分了吧！

你曾经告诉过我，
每个人都有自己的私人空间。。。拥有自己的朋友。
但为什么只是谈个电话都不能吗?
更何况我已尽量盖电话了，
你却说聊了整半个小时才说尽量要盖了吗?
你为什么你就不要这样讲话不可？？？

不是说好有什么问题都要坦白的吗？
不是说好忘掉过去活在未来吗？
不是说好要信任彼此吗？
这一切的承诺算是什么呢？

没有信任的感情是不会长久的。。。
你担心自己做得不比以前的‘他们’好，
但你知道你并不是最差的那个吗？
我并没有嫌弃你！

你已经对我很好了，
其实你并不知道你比他们对我疼爱有加~
你已是我心目中最好的老公了！

老公，
不要再做比较好吗？
这样我们的感情路上会走得很辛苦的，
人是没有十全十美的~~

我只想待在你身边。。。

为了让彼此的感情不变质，
尽量地改掉自己的坏脾气、迁就你。
这一切你都看不出在我心目中你扮演的角色有多重要吗？
不想因为你对自己没有信心而影响了之间的感情。

我们之间兜兜转转还是在回一起的，
这段来的不易的感情为什么不好好地珍惜呢？

♂开心♡放松的日子♀

4月30日，下午就开车去pangkor了，总共有六个人去。。。还蛮远的。第一次跟‘老公’去玩，再远也是开心的。

到达那儿也已经天黑了，坐上租来的摩多‘老公’载着我，我既然会想起on zai，想起以前一起开心又傻的日子，有点。。。说不出的感伤！

跟’老公‘、干姐姐、干姐夫、还有两个麻辣佬。。。这次的旅程非常开心~一路上有说不完的笑话，让人笑翻天。不幸的是，‘老公’生病了=(

四个酒鬼在喝酒，我们的第一张合照！

傻傻的老公生病了，却在做傻事！yan姐姐从楼上拍下来的。

5月1日，一早起身去吃了早餐就去找沙滩了！‘老公’原来怕太阳也怕水的。。。。天啊！那么舒服的大自然。。。我爱死了！

坐船到一个小岛上。。。是称它为白沙滩吧！咸咸的海水~细细的白沙~满地的贝壳和珊瑚~炎热的太阳~一阵阵的冲浪声~感觉好舒适！

童心未了~秋千+无邪的笑容!

等待小船载我们去小岛的当儿，下水嬉耍一会！(^-^)

帅帅老公和性感老婆的合照。

老公怕走光的笨笨样子+老婆依赖的样子！

后面的三个傻佬被水冲走了~

两个勇敢的女子站在大石上。。。

绿色+浅蓝大自然，我爱你！

我们与大自然拥抱~

bikini写真照!哈哈 taken by:SanG

很傻的我们~~~

漂亮干姐姐和妹妹

老公~在吃我‘豆腐’吗？

老公很狼狈的样子~

*4 of us*

就要离开小岛的最后合照。